My Life

2010-06-07T01:22:00.000-07:00

5mth have past in 2010... so many things happen bad & good one. some i can forget but some i can't forget till the day i die.

I love my 2boys so much they are my life my hubby well.... hahahahahaha..... sayang lah...

I am at work now can't really have time for facebook & blogger when i'm at home, finish work go home attend to the kids and rest & start back all over again the next day.

2010

2010-01-14T03:04:00.000-08:00

2010..... hmmmm lama tak update my blog.... many thing happen in 2009 more sadness than happiness, i hope thing will get better this year...

Akif will be 1 years old this 27th Jan, still skinny as ever... makan banyak but still the same bodyframe I just hope he tak sakit.

Akid makin mature but makin skinny , he hate to eat but he love he's milk.

now i have a maid, i hope with the maid help with the house chores & taking care of the boys, i can make more money..... that's my aim for this year & ofcourse get my driving license.

2009-11-21T13:40:00.000-08:00

On the 20th Nov,Akid turn 3years old..... dah 3tahun budak tu..... my parenthood begin now as we need to ajar akid alots of thing in life.

I love him so much, word can never discribe it. i need more kesabaran with this boy, i can see that he is half like me & half like daddy.... keras kepala.....degil, all the bad things ada pada diri dia. I hope as he grow-up he change his perangai.

As for Akif, he is malay boy..... hehe.... why i said that... he like food all with taste of malay... hotcake from Mcdonald he reject, but he like the hasbrown.... swensen also he reject but he like the ice-cream & the soup..... makan banyak badan tak naik-naik..... hmmmm must feed him more.

2009-11-12T13:04:00.000-08:00

I hate you all my life I don't care who you are to me

2009-10-09T08:45:00.000-07:00

Raya pon dah nak habis......... raya dah tak meriah... mungkin all grow-up & has own family and so on..... whatever lah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

my mum call me , saying that kak noi nak datang umah mlm nie.... and i said .. ahhhh betul ke??? asking her how she manage to dapat cari her... but she buzy working .. she just said mlm nie datang umah...

i did't manage to meet up with kak noi.. coz she come late and dah mlm nak go my mum place.... but we manage to talk on the phone..... there is so much i want to tell to her. btw kak noi is my cousin long long long long lost cousin, we grow up together coz at 1 point i stay at my nenek house, my nenek raise her since she's a baby. so when i stay sana she 's my frenz.

I think arwah nenek & atok , kalau masih ada lagi pat dunia nie, mesti happy kalau dia dapat tengok perubahan kak noi sekarang..... mak cakap dia dah kawin & have 1 baby boy 3mth old.

well i hope besok i can meet up with her, she said she balik kerja she singgah umah my mum, so i can jumpa her there..... yippeee

2009-09-01T16:43:00.000-07:00

It's been so long seyy tak blog... my daily routine is so buzy with the kids and all, hai... i don;t even have time for myself, i need facial , reborn my hair & colour my hair, but all that need atlease 5 hoours outside.... siapa nak jaga anak2??? must think of a way!!!!

Akif dah tumbuh 2 gigi... hahahaha cute when he is in a good mood.... but the gigi thing make me crazy!!! he can't stop crying .... mengegek2... tak nak susu... hai.......

Akid he is makin nakal.... but sweet boy... always kissing his brother... & he still fuss about his meal :( :(

ma day

2009-08-03T07:20:00.000-07:00

Lama sey tak blog... a lot of things happen but nothing major....

My day as usual berperang dengan my 2 boys... stressfull SANGAT-SANGAT!!!! but by the end of the day it's berbaloi....

This few days i am feeling unwell don't know why... i feel so so so penat even dapat tidur 5 hour at night... selalunya ok by the next day.. nie dah 1week, penat je... nak kata aku preggy,,, aku baru uzur... but the feeling like you preggy seyyy... nak kata makan tak bervitamin mungkin jugak ahhh ... dah tua gaknya.

Dah 3hari my left side tummy below sakit tempat operation, down know why?? i think over bergerak... hope nothing serious.

Akif dah start makan solid food, i feel so good bila dia makan so he can put on some weight.... hmmm besok akif ada vaccination... sakit lagi budak tu..... hai... apa nak buat dah nasib baby kena injection je tiap bulan.

Wedding Aniversary & Bday

2009-07-25T07:12:00.000-07:00

1 week tak blog.... sibuk sangat dengan budak2 kalau ada masa for my sleep even few minit pon jadi lah.. janji dapat lelap mata..... my Akif sakit tak baik2 since visit SGH on 17th july... susah dia nak susu & tidur akibat hidung sumbat & banyak lendir.... thur 23th july i decided to bring him to PD doc kasi 4obat so far ada perubahan after fewdays makan obat.... alhamdulillah

Akid... makin nakal... asyik kena marah everyday kena pukul kalau dia nakal sangat... we have to displine him... kalau tak, percuma je aku lahirkan dia pat dunia nie....

24july my 8th wedding aniversary.... hmmmm diam tak diam dah 8tahun kawin.... hope berkekalan hingga ke akhir hayat...

24july it's my bday too.... hahahahaha.... dah tua aku 33years of age... apa aku capai.... ??? so far dah rasa mengandung 2 kali, melahirkan anak... dah pernah beli kereta... dah pernah kerja gaji besar... beli rumah... dah pernah ada business sendiri... dah bankrupt!!! @ 32years of age... tinggal few thing aku kena capai... lesen kereta & others hope to make it by 35years old.

hope by 35 or 36tahun kalau ada rezki i want to get preggy again ... nak try for twins hahahahaha... tu pon kalau larat... dah tua beb!!!!!

Now kita ada duit to celebrate but takde time pulak.... our aniversary makan old chang kee & Mc.... hahahahahaha it's ok as long i have my 2son & husband with me i'm the happiesss person in this world... takde duit pon takpe as long dorang ada by myside....

tadi we go ECP lagoon makan seafood , punya lah panas cuaca..... tak enjoy langsung.... the food ok ok. ingat nak masak but no time to go pasar maybe besok subuh lah go pasar... nie niat je... kalau dapat buat,,, best!!

sampai umah je..... semua lepak... ofcourse akif tak nak lepak... coz dia dah tidur pat bus.... i get to sleep 20minit.... takpe lah.... sayangkan anak kena berkorban mata.... :)=

SGH

2009-07-17T10:11:00.000-07:00

4hari tak blog, after monday insident, i tell my self, everyday i wake up early around 5am & don't sleep till 12am, bangun je kejutkan my husband to go work after he go work @5.30am, i start my chores usualy habis around 7+am, Aku mandi & kalau Akif lum bangun i can sleep till he wakes up, but usualy Akif bangun around 7+am... Akif bangun je mandikan dia & kasi susu & play with him whole day.... baru dia tak menangis.... well,,, i did it on tuesday 14July it work!!! so i guess i akan buat beterusan, fucking penat imagine wake up 5am tidur 12am..... :(

today aku & Akif appt @ SGH.... my 2nd sis hantar in the morning around 8am she fetch me, we sent her kids to childcare & trus dia hantar aku ke SGH... Akif kena bronkindtis doc said all the lender dah masuk dlm lungs dia so kena suck lender2 dia menangis macam nak RaKKKK!!!! but lucky ada nurse melayu she sing to him..... hahahahahaha..... coz i said to the nurse i don't want to see dorang buat sucktion to him.... tak sanggup.... kesian budak kecik kena buat begitu but apa nak buat dia sakit...... suppost my husband meet me there after his work but he cannot make it.... so i struggle with 2kids alone, penat gila....... i can see budak2 pon penat, Akid lak beRak 2 kali ..... what a troublesome............ Aku buat pap smear & check my tumbuhan dlm my rahim.... well, it's not disepering & not growing kena keep on going for check-up..... to monitor it.... habis je , we take a cab home, tak sanggup nak tungu my husband lambat sangat.... Akif dah merengek2...... terkopak $100+ just for today.... taxi,obat & check-up for 2 pax.... Nest week 24July Akif kena go again....... for follow-up, i also can buy my medication there....

Fuck

2009-07-13T14:43:00.000-07:00

I had a very fucking bad day.......... Akif merengek whole day!!!!! Akid sakit so tak go sch. I'm so stressss & angry i just don't want to remember what happen.... mlm nya i sms my hubby that i wanted to give Akif away to anyone..... he said nie cobaan dari Allah kita kena tahan......... WTF

2009-07-12T05:37:00.000-07:00

Semalam tidur at 12.30am, This morning aku tersedar dari tidur @ 6.00am, look at my bed & open my room door, my husband lum balik, so i call him he's still sending people home, He ask me sama ada nak singgah pasar geylang tak, to buy untuk masak, so i say beli kerang & few other thing yang lain.

Akif bangun @ 6.55am, nak susu mata dia dah terbukak besar, hai.... tak boleh tidur lah nampak nya aku... kasi dia susu then mandikan Akif. My husband sampai umah 7.45am, he said he want to eat seafood, so i masak udang stim, kerang rebus,taugeh ikan asin, buat sambal belacan & kicap masih.... hmmmm sedap tu buat sarapan.... for Sunday!! Akid lak bangun @8am by 8.30am makanan dah siap atas meja so we eat, Akid main2 dengan Akif, EVENDO Akif merengek, Akid bully adik dia, still aku dapat makan jugak, walaupon tak peacefully but Allamdulillah......

My husband ada kerja @12sharp, we plan to go mandi laut,but not me & the boys just daddy, coz nak rendamkan badan my husband pat air masin.... Akid tak pernah mandi laut dia takut, kita pernah bawak dia bila dia 1year + he cry teruk.... but that time i have a maid & i'm expecting 4month so ok lah. So tadi sampai je pat ECP Akif tidur & i just gamble bawak baju mandi Akid hope dia nak mandi, my husband dah berendam & Akid main mainan coz kita duduk pat shelter face the sea, too my suprise Akid bongkar my bag dia ternampak baju mandi.... he said ,, mummy nak swimming.... OMG!!! i just layan kan je dia , pakaikan dia his baju mandi then adik pon dah bangun... so i bring both of them dekat skit pat sea so Akid can watch his daddy mandi, so i signal my husband yang akid nak mandi, then my husband naik to take take Akid , main2 dengan dia pat sand first lah then pelan2 masuk dlm laut.... punya lah teperanjat me & my husband... Akid like it so much..... ahhh..... lega hati ..... habis je his daddy mandikan Akid then he can't stop talking about the mandi laut keep asking bila nak go swimming lagi.... hahahahaha...... kids..... hate them or love them........ Akif biasa lah nak dukung most of the time so he tak menangis...... so after swimming kita go simpang bedok makan. after makan.... balik coz my husband ada kerja at 8pm.

Today not so bad day for me, coz most of the time i'm with Akif so he tak melalak..... Akif dah tidur @ 8.45pm after minum susu 240ml.... banyak tu...... Akid tadi dah tidur nie atas my lap, dia dah bangun..... tak penat2 budak nie.......

2009-07-10T17:03:00.000-07:00

6days tak blog, alot of things happen this few days, just don't have time for myself.... for the past 5days not so bad lah, like biasa akid still crying bila nak go school, akif still no improvement even we call him Manja also SAMA STILL CRYING..... by the way Manja is given by my mum-in-law, she say that Akif is very manja that's why he want attention 101% well that is her view, kita ikut je so we are now experimenting her view lah...... :)

Thurs 9th july, my husband nya psoriasis getting worse coz he stop going to NSC due to stress with his work so we decided to go for steroid jab we went to Downtown East, i got complimentary ticket naik Ferris Wheel if i got the spelling right.... Akid nak naik kuda2 & train , Akif pon naik train too cry abit lah, then we went makan seafood, ingat nak go ECP but it's raining so we had dinner there.... we had fun walaupon Akif cry abit nak dukung, tak nak sit pat stroller......... as for my husband busy2 sms people coz he's looking for perm driver to relief him at night, so he can do other things... & rest more!!

His Vito still in workshop still finding money $4500 to keluarkan bus tu...

Friday 10th july, ayu & hafiz teman kan go meeting pat twcc, ofcourse with the 2boys, i already kenalkan to MAEC people yang dorang reprisentatitave from silat kalau i tak dapat hadir. lepas 1 balak, i don't think i can get involve for 1 or 2 year i hope they can do the job dengan baik...

Saturday 11 July, is HELL for me, my sec sis call me early in morning ajak go Suntec coz she want to bet for the new paper auction or something..... so after planning with my husband, i & my 2boys join dorang coz my husband kerja, kita naik MRT budak kecik 7 orang tua 4, kecoh MRT budak2 nie buat, Akif menangis jugak nothing new abt him lah.... punyalah leceh dengan budak2 tu kita turun cityhall then we walk to suntec city, sampai je dah banyak barang kena auction. Akif lak melalak non-stop, coz tempat tu bising, maybe dia teperanjat he cry for 1 hour at suntec, spoil our plan..... lepas menangis dia tidur dari kul 3+ till 6+ i dukung dia all he time, tangan nie naik sebal tak rasa. husband fetch us all , we went to thomson road ziarah monkey coz ada budak2 kasi dorang happy.

Sampai umah menangis lagi after minum susu he cry for 45min OMG!!!! i am so so so so stress, dah lah tak makan 1 whole day angkara dia menangis aje...... Akid pon today makan junk food tak makan proper meal. WHAT A HELL DAY FOR ME!!! susah betul nak berhentikan his crying...... i am so streesss , i cry until aku terlepas cakap dengan Allah , apa lah dosa aku sampai kau kurniakan aku anak begini !!! supricesingly Akif stop crying and he doze off dengan tersedu2 dalam tidur.... entahlah tu secara kebetulan or trying to show me something???

Another day for me besok, apa lah nasib aku.............

2009-07-05T07:48:00.001-07:00

Yesterday lunch hour akid tak nak makan nasi, i know he's hungry but he just won't eat, setan dah naik kepala... apa lagi aku sebat dengan hanger baju... i knoe it's so sakit sampai berbilai peha akid & still dia tak nak makan..... kalau ikutkan hati... mati budak nie aku pukul... I walk away from him & buang nasi tu.... & i told him no milk for you..... i didn't give him milk till sunday morning, akid pun takut nak mintak............ i really don't know what to do

from what i did to akid, aku kena marah dengan my husband, he said i've already told you kalau nak pukul gunakan suratkhabar not benda yang keras takut putus urat budak nie..... aku just diam and play with akif. I just can't control my anger when akid did something really wrong... I guess i'm starting to follow my dad nya perangai... which i hate it so much......

Akid..... if you can understand this..... i know you don't like to kena pukul & marah , maafkan mummy.... i am trying to be a good mother and want to you to behave child...... cry cry cry.......

tadi siang aku jumpa ayu pat LRT umah dia, i want to buy obat gigi akid pat punggol plaza, terlanjur going there, i meet ayu to collect duit SKL, so she no need to come down to my house.... susahkan dia je. On the way going there, akif menangis, kuat pulak tu..... akid pulak terlompat2 macam monyet.... kalau dah budak2 tu kalau tak marah nanti dia pikir nie playground , kalau marah aku nie garang sangat semua tak boleh..... hai.... susah betul jadi mak

today takde gelanggang lagi, hafiz roi said ada 1 murid but dia sakit perut, so i said to hafiz tutup sudah gelanggang. need to do something to tw nya gelanggang.....

around 5+ i went to kg cc & TW to sign some document, then we went makan dinner burger king at Compasspoint, Akid makan fries,nugget ayam & skit cheeseburger & a lot of chocolate, member dah lapar sangat..... dia tak makan dari pagi, Akif as usual menangis jugak, bila kita letakkan dia pat stroller he want to be carry & close to you..... this 2 boys tidur at 10pm, dah penat halfday keluar.

it raining day nak go pasar mlm nak look see pon tak dapat..... besok ah kalau cuaca mengizinkan.

besok.....monday....... hai.... start all over again i'm so so penat of all this.

2009-07-03T08:14:00.000-07:00

Dah 3rd july so sekejab half of the yeear already GONE JUST LIKE THAT. Today Akid menangis pat depan pintu gate sekolah dia, he said... i don't want sch..... hai pening aku dibuatnya..... and Akif my little manja is always crying, tak tahu apa sebab... bila dia bangun he also nak you bangun & play with him...... sampai dia mengantuk, susah betul!!! siapa tak sayang anak but i have my limit to sabar, kadang tu macam nak hempas je budak tu but aku belum gila lagi nak buat gitu.

I hope as he grow month by month he change, if not... entah lah word can't decribe how stress i am :(

7pm I suppost to go buy my lens & beli obat for myself to eat every month but tak sempat coz Akid is sleeping & Akif is awake and merengek... nak bawak dia go clinic takut abg dia bangun takde orang pat umah nanti dia takut & menangis.... so i didn't go, besok pagi lah after mandikan budak2 nie....

Akid susah betul nak makan nasi.... nak maggie,maggie & maggie.......... so aku denda dia tak kasi susu... stilll ungkal don't want to makan nasi... so i let him be lapar... suck lah kau jari sampai putus i told him..... he just sit & bling @ me then suck his finger again..... what the what lah...........

Ever since aku duk umah & jaga budak2 nie.... i don't know wether i'm happy & is this the life that i want it to be?? i guess dah terlambat nak U-turn........

Vaccination

2009-07-01T09:50:00.000-07:00

Today akif kena monthly injection, dia demam lagi... thhis will go on for few days.... kecian akif, menangis non-stop... tak nak tidur... i need to be in front of him most of the time, kalau tak... dia menjerit like orang nak pukul dia..... cepat lah besar Nak........

First day of school

2009-06-29T04:01:00.000-07:00

Today, akid go school after 1mth school holiday... he's so excited keep on looking at the clock.... macam paham je.... hehehehe...... it's a good thing that akid nak go school tak perlu paksa2 macam dulu..... he's happy to meet with his friend... & Akif he's happy just him and his mummy.... attention all to him for 1half hour....... :)

My husband nya minibus sakit kuat.... lagi.... kalau nak repair kena bayar $5k........ mana nak cari duit... stresss rabakzzz for my husband :(

Public transport

2009-06-28T09:34:00.000-07:00

It's has been 1month i think, my husband minibus still in the workshop, cannot get it fixes properly.... duit banyak dah keluar.......... budget very tide... betul nya tide.... :( i'm so sad.

Today, we went to Boon Lay place naik MRT, imagine it's been too long tak naik public transport, OMG !!! penat, ramai orang, mana akif menangis, akid tak tahu diam, but but it's fun lah coz dah lama me & anak-anak tak spent time dengan my hubby, reached aje Boon Lay MRT we nak naik cab, berpusing-pusing cari taxi stand.... hahahahahaha......oo well we are not taman jurong nya residents.... hehehehehe.....

So finally we have reached that place untuk sewa minibus, coz kalau takde minibus, we have to pay taxi claim to others.... susah!!! kita sampai around 8.20pm that bus belum available, so we go to my husband nya friend house to install some software.... sampai je umah that person, my husband nya friend lady friend said, wahhh.... yusof .... your wife is very beautiful..... she said it few time.... my husband dah malu.. he carry on with his installation on the PC. 9pm the bus is available so we said bye to the lady friend.. & go the minibus.... and cepat-cepat balik coz my husband kerja at 10.45pm till morning.... so in the minibus on the way back to sengkang my husband said, that lady cakap you beautiful... hahahaha.... & i said gemuk gini pon masih lawa.... so we laugh.... sepanjang perjalanan dari umah to boon lay, i dukung akif.... bayang kan betapa sakitnya tangan kiri... problem lah budak tu... nak kan attention 101%%... rabazzz seyyyy... i'm hoping my little boy change as he grow... susah jaga lah & i'm stresssss everyday........ & my husband minibus keluar from that workshop, we we don't have to rent bus.....

Today i had fun with my husband & kids, walaupon tak kemana but spent time like that also i appreaciate , thanks darling... i love you

like what the hell......

2009-06-25T23:40:00.000-07:00

Yesterday i've ask byzura to come to my house to do my business blog, dia sampai umah like 9.30pm & she cannot finish if she go home yesterday, lagi pon dah kul 11.30pm mlm nah kalau nak balik...

so i call my mum, saying that she sleep here tonight & besok pagi2 along kejut kan dia, my mum bising tak kasi byzura sleep over, like macam aku nie siapa dengan dorang....?? kawan byzura ka pe tak kasi tidur , hello..... aku nie kakak dia.... then at 12.30pm she call byzura but byzura tak nak pick-up so she call my hp, nak cakp dengan byzura, abah lak bising, like byzura cakap so many days he tak call kenapa dia call mlm nie.... nie mesti mak buat cerita so byzura balik or dia call abah bilang......

Ever since byzura balik umah dorang she has become socai.... dorang kena ikut dorang keluar just to take care the 5 kids.... like Duh...... macam takde kerja pulak..... & her study drop.... pity byzura.... but what to do she has made a decision & to me it's a wrong decision.....

I don't understand my parent..... my relationship with them is complicated and i regret to be born in this family....... it's SUCK!!!!! full of drama...... & i don't want to treat my children like the way they treat me....

Cry baby

2009-06-01T06:32:00.000-07:00

I love my 2 son but the 2nd one is so troublesome, must cry everyday izzit??? hai .... dia lahir tak cukup bulan ke? but tak mungkin lah..... entah lah, i don't know.... i am so penat, nak kemas umah pon tak larat....... i can see that the 2nd one need attention more but abg also need me, so how?? leceh betul lah, i wish i had a maid so that she can uruskan hal umah and me hal anak-anak..... nanti lah... the time will come 1 day...........

can't go on like this............

2009-05-03T06:35:00.000-07:00

having to take care 2kids age 2 & few mth old is no so so easy........... everyday macam pergi perang.......... hmmmm if i can turn back the clock i only want 1 child till he get's older then i will plan for the next one..... but things happen for a reason i guess..... i don't have time for myself, hai.... i'm so stresss!!!!!!!!!!!! help me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Stress!!!!!!!!!!!! why am i doing this.............

2009-03-24T15:53:00.000-07:00

I'm so stress this few days..... the kids driving me crazy... my husband busy with his work... aahhhhhhoooo i wish i don't have children and don't have to deal with all this nonsense ... so fed-up!!!!!!!!!!!

Headache......

2009-03-08T23:45:00.000-07:00

now that i have 3 men in my life !!! exciting but troublesome sometime.... where daddy needs attention too... where else now Akif don't want to sleep in his baby cot at night.. 3 of us have to squeeze in 1 bed, Akid has his own bed but sometime squeeze in too .... hai.... stress+body ache

I guess this is life with many kids... hahahahaha, Sometime i don't ever have time for myself..... I'M SO STRESS OUT!!!!!!

When will this end!!!

2009-03-02T13:56:00.000-08:00

Yesterday was a terrible days for me... the sub court come to my house to paste sticker on the stuff that they think can sell... well few things that don't belongs to me and my husband will claim it from the sub court today... pity my husband , it's my problem and I have to pull him in to his matter...

I fell like want to sleep and don't want to wake up anymore...........

thinking....

2009-02-28T16:43:00.000-08:00

life is not always you wanted to be...... sometime it's suck!!!

Stress!!!!!!!!!!!! why am i doing this.............

2009-02-27T02:43:00.000-08:00

I'm so stress and I can't do anything about it!!!!!!!!!!! I guess just live with it for few month............ stress with my life................ now :(

so tired thinking too much

2009-02-24T17:13:00.000-08:00

I've received letter from Subordinate court on write of seizure, let it be lah , I do care but what can i do about it..... :( I can't get $60K overnight....... so sian lah

I just want to get over it and & be a bankrupt!!!

bring it on man!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

My Life

2009-02-22T04:20:00.000-08:00

Angel is my nick name, I am 33 years old married with 2 son. Born on 24 July 1976, life has been up & down for me, sooner or later, I might be bankrupt and its all thanks to my decision making on starting a food business in March 2008 just 1 month plus the business not doing well, I was force on making another decision on quitting. I've made my decision and carry on with my life.

It's been hard for me & my husband we are struggling to meet the dead end every end of the month on bills that need to settle. That time we have a maid to take care of our son when we are out to work. I found a new job in June at a legal firm for 2 month contract, suppose convert to perm after the 2 month but they say headcount freezeeee and I that time I am expecting my 2nd child, I know it's going to be hard to find a job when your are preggy... but I found another job in some employment agency they offer 6 month contract till I give birth.. ooo well I except it, It's a boring job.... frankly say but I stay on due to I'm expecting. Soon after few month working there, I've got a bad news.... due to company not doing well, they can't continue my contract and it's over for me there and I'm out of job since Oct 2008.

I've been staying at home since then... it's hard for my husband the only breadwinner... we still have a maid and this year in January 2009, My parent & younger sister come stay my place due to my dad had a misunderstanding with my sister & her husband.. well I am the older one, I simply can't say NO to them.... they are my parent!! Now my mum decided to go back to my 2nd sister house, she said she's more comfortable there.

My due date for giving birth is on 20 Feb 2009, but I guess I am in a lot of stress lately and more people in the house more thingssss to think about, I give birth at 25 plus week due to bleeding very heavy and my placenta is low. Had to go through Emergency C-Section It's a very painful experience but my baby boy is born premature but safe & healthy. We name him Mohamad Akif Angel

We sent back our maid few days I come back from the hospital and I take care everything from now on.... from bathing my 1st son & 2ns son, cleaning the house, cook.... We sent her back bcoz we need to save $500 everymonth & I still think it's a pratical thing to do due to I'm not working..... Somethime my husband, my dad & my sis help a bit in house work and take care of my 2 babyssss, they a great help!!!! I appreaciate them on helping me, even not that prefect but ok lah :)

I cry every day when I'm stress with myself & my 1st son. I cry becoz I can't play with my son due to my operation part still painful,I CAN'T carry him, I CAN'T sit on the floor & play with him. I cry becoz I am in pain most of the time, with no help from my in law & own mother....... so sad when I think about it.

My dad move out from my flat 2 weeks ago and it's all becoz I raise my voice at him but I don't mean it.... ahhhhh very childish of him... wellll let him be lah maybe he got a motive.... now left my younger sister staying with me, I hope she's happy here....

It's been 3weeks plus, I am healing fast, I guess I must be strong even it's to painfull to swollow.